Tuesday, October 6, 2009

The One Where She Was a Monster

Yesterday I found myself giving unsolicited advice to a friend. For like… forty-five minutes! I’ve never liked that quality in others, and have always admired my parents for being so good at refraining from doing so. It’s pretty bad when you can’t just have a friendly conversation, right? A listening ear? I don’t always have to have my say.

I need to watch my monster mouth, and ask myself, before I speak:

Is it timely?
Is it true?
Is it kind?
Is it necessary?

Maybe I should carry around a stack of post-it notes with those questions printed on them, with check boxes alongside. Maybe with a little reminder at the bottom that says, You. Are. Not. Everyone’s. Mom. Or maybe just some duct tape. For my mouth. Am I really the advice monster?

5 comments:

Cherie said...

Well Was it good advice?

I think that we all do this sometimes when we naturally care about someone else and want to help.
I am sure your friend understands.

sad but true said...

It wasn't even me? You give great advice.

Carolyn said...

I've spent the last 10 years wishing for a fairy godmother...emphasis on the mother would somehow appear and give me the support and love I never got from my mother.

I finally gave up.

I think most of us want good advice from someone who cares. It's the condecending advice from those who are just trying prove their own superiority that is not so valuable. I'm sure your advice is of the former variety not the latter.

That was way too long and rather rambling and not pithy at all. Sigh.

JUST ME, THE MOM said...

I think that a little advice never hurts, we all still have the option to pick and choose what we listen to and heed. Several times I've had my eyes opened to a different side of a situation coming from someone outside the situation. So you never know . . .

Kristin

Merrianne said...

i need the duct tape