The One With the Bloggy Chain Letter

I started catching up on blogs yesterday, and found that Tauna over at the Garden of Egan, bestowed a little bloggy award, and I was one of the recipients. Tauna is a new friend, a nurse, and puts the “fun” in dysfunction. Thank you ever so…

The rules of the award are: List seven things about yourself. Link back to the person that gave you the award. Pass the award on to seven bloggers.

Given the fact that a) you already know way more random details about me and my life than anyone probably should and b) I am feeling snarky as usual, I have decided instead to give you seven of my random opinions today. In no particular order.

1. I think that there are some people in the world whose primary contribution is decoration. I salute those people. I enjoy looking at them. In most cases, the upkeep is prohibitive, so I do not envy their job. And as I am not one of them, I need to figure out what my contribution is supposed to be right now. It’s a little confusing.

2. I don’t think that being a grandmother is better than being a mother. I am not in the market for any more babies, but seriously, how lazy do you have to be to think that the up-side is being able to send them home at the end of the visit?

3. I think it is possible to get through four years without even thinking about the president of the United States even one time. If the thought starts to cross my mind, I just think of food, and it passes. It has been over a year now, and I haven’t given old what’s-his-name a moment’s notice. Probably, politics will not be my primary contribution.

4. In a battle of dishwasher vs. clothes washer, the dishwasher is going to win every time. I would rather wear dirty clothes than eat off dirty dishes.

5. I have a new Facebook strategy that I am trying out. Every time I accept a new friend request, I have to “unfriend” someone on my friend list whom I don’t actually know (strangely, there are quite a few of those where I have no idea who they are, and we have no friends in common). It is like virtual recycling… the Facebook Circle of Life. Refreshing and environmentally friendly. If you’re reading this, and notice that you are no longer my Facebook friend, sorry... I couldn’t place your face. If you are reading this and you don’t know who I am, you are probably next to go.

6. I think it is kind of weird how people assign gender to inanimate objects. Like, why are boats feminine, for instance? I have known people who name their cars… and they are almost never male. Hurricanes always used to be women, but now, out of political correctness, they take turns wreaking devastation. In fact, I have been reading the book “Jesus, the Christ” by Talmage, and he actually refers to church in the feminine. How does that even work in languages where words are assigned gender? How can “el barco” be named Lola? I find it puzzling. That said, my washer is a boy, and my dishwasher is a girl, but don’t worry… one is kept upstairs, and the other down.

7. I noticed that today is National Goddess of Fertility Day. Wait. We have a day for that? Just a single day? I have devoted half my life to it. I have single-handedly beaten out most known methods of contraception. If I was a superhero, I would be the Goddess of Fertility. How do you fight bad guys as the Goddess of Fertility? If you have to ask that, you didn’t know me when I was pregnant. I could go from hungry, to starving, to just plain mean in under a minute. Don’t. Mess. With. That.

Thanks for playing... those are just the random opinions that floated through my mind this morning. You know there’s always more where that came from.

And now to nominate seven bloggers to carry on this bloggy equivalent of a chain letter:

Kristin: who is unfailingly nice and kind and even checks on me when I go missing for a few days at a time.

Carolyn: who has no time to do this, but might anyway, and even if she doesn’t, go check her out.

Shelley: who has time in the middle of the night to think about what she will say in the post, but may not get around to actually blogging it…

Debbie, who gives me the shivers. Actually, she just gave me the book, Shiver, which gave me the shivers.

Annie, who is adorable and just started her blog, and whom I have asked numerous times to marry one of my sons, because I am such a good mother-in-law. I will eventually wear her down. I have five boys left for her to choose from.

Jessi, the choosy mom who is the only person alive who could argue whether or not I am in actuality a good mother-in-law.

Rachel, my favorite Italian Signorina/singerina (sorry about the really lame play on words right there).