Tuesday, January 4, 2011

The One Where She Keeps it Fresh

It’s trash day, and it is time to say goodbye to the dead tree. And any lingering Christmas decorations will be tucked into the room under the stairs (yes, we have one of those… Harry Potter would be quite comfortable). Last year in the middle of March I was walking down our street on trash day, and spotted this:


Some people just really don’t like to throw anything away. I do. I think that along with the tree, a few more things from 2010 should be out by the basketball hoop waiting for the trash guy.

Here are some of my suggestions. Feel free to add your own.

The show Bridalplasty on E! Network. Where 12 women compete to win a dream wedding and the plastic surgery of their dreams. Oh. My. Gosh.

My home phone land line. Bye bye.

LOL. And no, I’m not laughing. You know who you are: Stop saying that.

The Shake Weight. Particularly the ads for it, but probably the actual device, too. Enough said.

Dinner With Schmucks. The worst movie I watched in 2010. Well, most of it… I couldn’t actually get more than about halfway through it.

Denny’s Fried Cheese Melt. They put fried mozzarella sticks inside a grilled cheese sandwich. I’m all for enjoying a big juicy burger now and again, and not think about the nutritional value. But come on… a fried cheese melt? That is just wrong.

Ke$ha. Because, gross.

The BCS. Oh, and while we’re at it, any remaining footage of Kyle Brotzman’s failed punts at the end of that Boise State v. Nevada game. ESPN should lose them and never speak of them again.

Kurt on Glee. Dear Kurt, you have hijacked a fun show and made it all about your sexual preferences. Can we have our show back, please?

California Lottery Tickets. They were supposed to ensure that our kids had the best education, with no school budget cuts… um, what?

He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named (President what’s-his-face that I never think about). Next, please.

Prius. Just because it is getting annoying.

Checking your texts during church.

Global warming. Because it isn’t actually a real thing.

And what the heck… while we’re at it,
Microsoft products
customer “support” lines
AT&T’s data plans
shoes that lace up (come on… it’s like the shoe version of a rotary phone)
cameras on stoplights
phonebooks
homework and
salad.

Done, and done.

8 comments:

Gr8Life said...

Salad was surprising. Is it all salads or just certain kinds of salad? Although I have not tried it I have heard good things about the "Snickers Salad".
I Would add to the list coupons that you receive when you are checking out at the store that you can only use on a certain day of the week Such as Walgreens Jinglebucks that you only had 3 days to use and they were worth $15.00! It takes me a least a week to remember I had the coupon and by then it's expired!! Heck You should just add all coupons to the list they are just annoying!!! All they do is make one feel guilty for not using them.

Welcome to the Garden of Egan said...

Wow Victoria, tell us how you REALLY FEEL????

Those are awesome pet peeves. I appreciate being able to add to my list.
I love the fried gaggy food one. Ick.
Oh, and lottery tickets, ya. Best education ever.

And NEXT is right.

Totally love it!

Anonymous said...

so true. :) more please.

Cindy said...

Loved this post!

Rachel Ricchio said...

OMG vic you're so right! LOL.

Kathi Oram Peterson said...

We think alike on many things. I'm with you! :)

Anonymous said...

I miss you!

Anonymous said...

PS anonymous is Lee Ann .. I just could not figure out how to post with my name on it.