Sunday, May 10, 2009

The Mother's Day One, Last Part

This is DK holding Josh, our first baby. That was the day I became a mother. I thought I knew what it would be like, but then he was born, and I found I had completely underestimated the situation. It was ever so much better, and oh so much worse. Euphoric…and dire. It was like safety and danger all rolled into one screaming rollercoaster package. When Adam and Eve chose to eat from the Tree of Knowledge and Good and Evil, they unleashed opposition… and that is what being a parent is all about. High highs, low lows, and lot of in between.

I think one thing that is hardest about being a mother is embracing change. In some ways I love change. I wouldn’t mind moving to new places (DK is a homebody). I change my hair, my clothes, my music… but then there is the matter of the kids. I don’t like change when it involves people I love going away. It only seems like a couple of years since DK held Josh in the nursery at St. Joseph’s, but the years have rushed by, and everything changes.

This photo is from the last Thanksgiving we were all together as a family. In 2004. (yes, Ethan regrets the Mark Hamill hair-do) Then Josh left on a mission, and before he got back, Tyler left on a mission, and before he got back Casey left on a mission. Everything changes. Does that make me sad? Yes. And also fiercely happy and proud. It is that opposition thing again.

When Skippy was born, I really learned how much things had changed. I wondered when I was expecting him, what would it be like to have a baby boy again, but this time in a houseful of teenage boys. I will tell you how it turned out: Magic.

Skippy was not just my baby…he was everyone’s baby.

Everything was a little sweeter. A little gentler. A lot happier.

I remember reading about how an only child turns out to be more successful, because he gets his parents’ undivided attention. Looking at Skippy, I think how sad it would be if all he had was his parents’ undivided attention.

And so everything changes. And today I am expecting a Mother’s Day call from a missionary.

For the fifth year in a row. And if all goes well, for five more years to come.

It stabs my heart a little that I don’t have all my babies around me anymore…because they aren’t babies anymore. And at the same time, what could be better?

Happy Mother's Day, everyone!


The family said...

YOU my friend, are an awesome mother. Sometimes God sends you tender mercies in the form of angel friends. I think you are my tender mercy friend.

Lisa--aka The Gardenweasel said...

I want more kids! Your posts make me wish I had all those wonderful boys and one perfect Cam......
you are brilliant. Happy Mother's Day, Happy Birthday.

and...are you sure that isn't Kevin holding Cade?

Jan the crazy lady said...

So exciting about the missionary call. Nothing like it. I have enjoyed reading about your family.

I did laugh when you said your mother hates the bodily functions and how you have had to let go of that because of the boys. Got it...

Mohterhood is full of challenges, I am like you, a gypsie of sorts wanting continual experiences abroad. But I know how selfish I would have been without the kids. A complete disaster of a person. They have bettered me.

Happy Mother's Day Victoria.


Carolyn said...

You have accomplished so much.

I am truly in awe.

Happy Mother's Day.

Debbie said...

I think your 'changes' description describes me. I love changes mostly but some are hard to swallow. What fabulous pictures of your beautiful family.

My hubbies family was the same way with the missions. They had 8 and the 4 boys were right in a row which meant about 8 years of at least one out in the field.

Happy Mothers day!

Della Hill said...

Great post.
Thnkas for sharing.
I love all the pics.
Happy Mother's Day!

Cherie said...

What a beautiful family you have! All of those big handsome boys and one sweet girl! Big families are the best!!
I can TOTALLY relate to everything you said here. Change can be hard - when they grow it is bittersweet!
We too had a late one and he also has been everyone's baby and we have had the chance to enjoy him So much!! Life is great! Family is the most important thing.

I can tell you are one heck of a fabulous mother!!

I hope you enjoyed your Mother's Day call - Those are SO SWEET!!

JUST ME, THE MOM said...

I love all the photos! They are wonderful, and you have such an marvelous family. So fun to read about your experiences and thoughts:)_


Tyler said...

I was planning to say that Ethan needs a light saber to go with the skywalker do, but he might get a real saber, marine style, and now I am jealous, not of the hair. Did You see me out there man i look good.